Miscarriage in Africa (Part 2)

So after we arrived back home from the hospital, John ran into Freetown with the intent of finding a place to have the D&C done and also a place for the tissue to be looked out to rule out cancer and determine if it was, in fact, a molar pregnancy.  He spent all afternoon going from place to place and came home very frustrated with the lack of customer service that we're so accustomed to in the states.  A new place, Aspen Medical was one of the only places that was helpful.  They put John in touch with the only pathologist in the country at Connaught Hospital in Freetown.  About 15 minutes before we found that information out, I had already called our travel agent to see about getting a flight out to the states on Thursday or Friday.  We were just unsure of whether we could get it done in country or not and the procedure was recommended to be completed within the week.  

We decided to try and go back to St. John's hospital the next day for the D&C since we trusted the doctor and he had already seen my personal case.  However, there were several unknowns: 

1. Would they be able to do the procedure that day 

2. Did they have the solution needed to preserve the tissue so we could transport it to the pathologist.  

Luckily, Emily was already heading to the hospital for her CHASL meeting and was able to find out for us.  By 9 am we got the go ahead and were on our way! 

By 10:30 we were at the hospital, checking in.  We had to pay for the procedure prior and it was 250,000 Leones which is about $45.  Then we had to pay another $13 for the equipment needed for my IV, prophylactic antibiotics, saline, and drugs for my conscious sedation.  John was running back and forth from the pharmacy buying what was needed, as needed.  Around 11:30 my nurse Isata got my IV line ready and I got dressed in my surgery gown.  

Hanging out with my IV line waiting for surgery.

A little after 12, they ushered me back to the operating room called the Theater.  John really wanted to come back with me and it sounded like they wouldn't let him.  The anesthesiologist started shooting me up with some drugs and taking the necessary vitals.  I remember asking him "don't you need to know my weight?" He then proceeded to look me up and down and actually made a guess that was right on so I shut my mouth.  

At that point, I was washing the gynecologist getting scrubbed in and them getting out the sterilized instruments and I started getting really nervous.  "Oh my gosh! What was I thinking getting surgery done in Africa? I don't want to see this.  I don't want to be seeing this.  Can't they knock me out already?"  And then I saw a breath of fresh air (my husband) come in.  They let him put on scrubs and a hair net and join us in the operating room.  I was simultaneously so glad to see him but also felt bad for him that he would have to see me go through this.

And then the next thing I knew was that I was waking up and they said the beautiful words "All Done".  I remember feeling so happy and thankful and possibly still a little loopy.  The Italian doctor gave me a big smile and put both hands to his lips and made a "muah" sound like you picture all Italians doing.  I remember seeing John's face and him telling me that the doctor recanted and believed it was NOT molar based on his findings.  Yay!! I also remember telling the guy rolling me out on the gurney what a great job he was doing.  I recovered there for about 30 minutes and we made the journey home. 

Post surgery thumbs up and probably still a little loopy 

On the way home, I finally got to eat for the day so stuffed my face with some peanut butter crackers and took some hydrocodone that I had never taken from a wisdom tooth extraction a year ago.  John and I enjoyed a nice ride home.  I feel like throughout this trial, God has been near me and so it has made it easy to trust in him and for the most part my emotions have been quite steady and content, even finding joy throughout much of my day.  Now that a few days have passed since the miscarriage and surgery, I have noticed my emotions fluctuating and having times where I feel the loss more strongly, but I think that is what can be expected.  May I continue to look to my Lord and find comfort in His presence. 

Things I was thankful for:
1. That I was able to get my D&C done in Africa and didn't have to rush my family to the states.
2. That I had a very experienced surgeon and one of the best hospitals in Sierra Leone
3.  John was able to be there with me in surgery
4. Most likely the pregnancy was not molar
5. Robin and Emily again for watching my kids, and Emily just happening to be at the hospital for a meeting that has been planned for months so she could ask the necessary questions.
6. Sooo many friends and family that have reached out to me with emails and messages of love, comfort, and encouragement.  

Miscarriage in Africa (part 1)

Today I was planning on sharing with the world (ahem: facebook) that we were going be expecting a new addition to our family come May.  I had a cute little Halloween shirt that Alice (the newest member of our team who arrived Thursday) was going to bring in.  It was black and then had the white bones of the Mom and then you could see the baby's bones too and it was waving.  

However, God's plans for me were different.  I had a different feeling about this pregnancy than the others.  The whole time I had felt more on edge.  When I was around 7 weeks, we got an ultrasound at one of our friend's house (Dr. Asher).  Her machine wasn't super high powered, but even so, we saw the flicker of the heartbeat and a small little baby in there.  That quelled my doubts for a few weeks until a friend of mine went through a miscarriage around 12.5 weeks.  I had purchased a doppler to use here because I thought it might be nice to monitor things at home since medical care is a little less accessible here. After the news of my friend, I got out the doppler and gave it a go.  At the time I was about 10 weeks and I couldn't find the heartbeat.  However, its very difficult to find the heartbeat with a doppler so early so I chalked it up to my inexperience.  However it prompted me to see if John would take me to the hospital for an ultrasound this past Tuesday when I would have been a little over 11 weeks.

Monday night I was getting my boys ready for bed and noticed some wetness on my shorts.  I decided to go check it out.  I remember at the time thinking "I wonder if I'm miscarrying?" And I was.  I kept thinking to myself "no, no, this is not supposed to happen!" I immediately called Emily and Robin who both comforted and advised me.  I layed down the rest of the evening and drank some water.  Emily told me "many people have some bleeding in the first trimester".  I didn't sleep well and was cramping.  

The next morning was quite traumatic.  I'll be vague on the details but it's been many years since I have cried that hard over a loss.  At that point, I was quite certain what was happening.  The night before I felt like my heart had made peace with what was happening, but the actual act of miscarrying was WAY MORE emotionally painful than the fact that we wouldn't get to add another Campbell to our clan mid May. John took the day off to be with me.  The boys stayed near and we let them watch movies.  

I am part of a "mom group" on facebook and they encouraged me to go get a scan to confirm.  Many of them had similar symptoms with a SCH (subchorionic hematoma- basically a huge bruise that can bleed and release clots) and were hoping that was all mine was.  This gave me a little bit of hope! Maybe I wasn't miscarrying after all! I did try and keep my heart guarded but I would be lying if I said I wasn't hoping for a different outcome.

We drove about 1.5 hours to Lunsar.  They have a hospital called Saint John of God there.  We signed in and walked straight to maternity.  When we got to maternity... they sent us back to the very front gate.  I guess they thought we were visitors because we were white, but they have a different protocol for patients.  I went throught the Ebola screening and was led to pay for our services and get a chart made up for us.  

Once we were all signed in, we waited in a hall with several other people.  We started a conversation with our neighbors who asked us what we were doing in the country.  We told him we worked under Willamette International and do a lot of water projects.  Turns out the guy, Eugene, knew Emily and would be seeing her the next day for a CHASLE (Christian Health Association of Sierra Leone) hosted by that hospital. 

Not too long after, we were ushered in to meet the doctor.  There was a nurse and a gynecologist both from Italy serving stints at the hospital.  They had the cutest accents but their English was not great.  They had me get up on the exam table.  I assumed they were going to do an abdominal ultrasound so when she asked me to pull down my skirt, I pulled it down about 2 inches.  Then she said, "No. All the way." Well, I assumed something was lost in translation so I just pulled it down 2 more inches.  Well this game kept on going for a while until I figured out there was no mistranslation and all my propriety was forced out the window.  Anyways, we all got friendly real quick.  They seemed real confused at what they were looking at on the ultrasound. They seemed incredulous that I had an ultrasound that showed a baby and a heartbeat. 

After the ultrasound was over, the doctor in his Italian accent said, "no baby, no pregnancy." He explained he thought my pregnancy was a molar pregnancy in which the fetus was not really a fetus and never had a heartbeat but more like a benign growth.  Molar pregnancies need at least a D&C to remove it, but sometimes require drugs if the growth has invaded the organ and can sometimes even become cancerous although he assured me that was very rare.  He did insist on needing the tissue examined by a pathologist to see if it had invaded the uterus and to make sure its benign. But unfortunately they didn't have a pathologist at the hospital so we would have to get the D&C done elsewhere at a place that was able to examine the histology.  Oh, and nobody there knew of a place in the country that was able to do that. 

A flower arrangement sweet Anabelle brought for me...

Well this post is already super long, so I'll leave it here at this cliffhanger and try to write more tomorrow... 

Here it's what I was thankful for this day:

1. John was so wonderful. He was so comforting yet he also pointed to me to God in my pain.

2. John was able to stay home with me on Tuesday and take me to the hospital on Wednesday. He has been SO busy with work and definitely missed important meetings and things he's been planning for months that were coming to fruition just this week.

3. A very well trained and I'm assuming very experienced gynecologist was at the hospital to help us. He had only been there one week prior to me showing up and is only in the country for two months.

4. I had Emily and Robin for comfort and friendship and they have been there for me.  They watched my kids and feed my family for entire days even amidst preparing for two short term and one long term missionaries that arrived on Wednesday and Thursday of this week.

Puppies

Chloe had eight puppies a little over a month ago. They are so adorable now!

Archer is a big fan.  He wants to hold as many puppies as possible and chases them around trying to pick them all up.

Marie, Owen, and Robin

What I'm loving hearing my kids say right now...

Aden:

-I would be more pleased with daddy if he built me a wood cutting machine.

-his prayer last night at dinner: thank you God for this food, thank you for letting me go back to Marie's house to play after dinner, and thank you for giving me this lovely brother that I can play with. (I think that middle "thank you" was more of a supplication!)

-I'm afraid it's your turn Mommy.

Archer:

His new favorite word is "mope" (nope) which he is exclusively using instead of "no". It's adorable!

-"Wha happened?" Much like Fred Willard in A Mighty Wind (an awesome mock-umentary). This happened after he smashed some banana in his hands and rubbed it all over his abdomen while "helping" me make dinner.

Dangerous Boys

If people wonder what I do all day... A lot of it is going back and forth between my boys to make sure they aren't about to seriously hurt themselves.

Exhibit A. Archer "The Climber" Campbell

He climbs the back of our couch and then up to the window. I'm pretty sure he would start scaling the window panes if I didn't interfere.

Exhibit B Aden "The Well-Balanced" Campbell

About five seconds after exhibit A occurred Aden called to me from outside. He said that he was cleaning himself off because he got mud on his shoes. I walked outside and found him washing himself in a collecting bucket of water precariously placed on the ledge of a four foot high wall's 

But like any mom of boys, we say a thank you Lord that we caught them in the nick of time and snap a quick picture that we will be showing their future wives so they know what kind of tom foolery will be passed down through the genes.

Landscaping

Aden has been doing a little landscaping of our front porch...

I was thinking things were looking a bit sparse...

I Have a Snake on my Kitchen Counter

It's 1 pm here in Sierra Leone and I just thought I would share a "day in the life of the Campbells". And if you want to skip the first part... I promise the end gets more exciting with pictures.

5:45- woke up... Got coffee going. Spent a few minutes in Bible study before

6:15- Archer woke up. Put on a backyardigans for Archer while I finished my bible study/coffee/scripture memory review

7:00 Aden woke up. We're working on reminding him to turn off the fan in his bed before he comes out (energy conservation because otherwise I will forget it's on until nap time. It's rainy season so the solar doesn't charge as efficiently so we need to save electricity where we can)

7:30 Aden helped me make some orange cranberry muffins for breakfast that we just got on our container that arrived two days ago which is akin to Christmas in Sierra Leone. 

8:00 I sent in the "assassins" as John calls them to wake him up. We eat breakfast and John leaves to get started on work.

8:30 John and Chad start working on a short circuit of the solar that pumps water from the dam at our property to the nearby community.  This involves digging up some electrical lines. Oh and it's raining today. I did some breakfast dishes and then started not to feel well because I took some medicine on an empty stomach so then Aden and I watched a Mickey mouse movie while Archer played around. 

10:00 After laying down for the movie I was feeling better so got the kids dressed and joined Robin in working on making decisions about what we should unpack from the container of Emily's.

11:00 We put together baby Ben's crib although I'm sure it took us twice as long as it would have taken John or Chad. We felt accomplished and excited for their arrival in less than a month!!! Yay! We made some plans of what to wait to get ready a little closer to their arrival. Picture Archer running around trying to get into everything between making escape attempts while we do all of the above.

12:00 Robin and I split up to make lunch for our families. While I'm whipping up some Mac n cheese for the boys and leftovers for me, I see John and our guys trying to get the snake out of the tractor. 

They tried pouring boiling water in the tractor arm yesterday with no success.

Today they tried turning on the tractor, moving the arms up and down, sticking long sticks in the arms. Finally, after John used up almost a full can of insect spray, the snake made its way out of its little nesting place and was slithering on the ground.  One of the well drilling guys (the one with the umbrella in the picture below) hit it with a stick. That and the poison spray made him rather slow moving.

And now I have a snake in an old peanut butter container on my kitchen counter.

12:45 We eat lunch. Archer goes down for his nap and John and Chad go back out in the rain to make sure we have water pumping to the community.

Water Fight!!!

We're in the heaviest part of rainy season right now. The rain stopped this morning just in time for a water fight with a water gun and a ketchup bottle.

I love this progression of pictures!

Aden's expression during his fleeting victory

Owen starting to get the upper hand

RUN AWAY!!! RETREAT!

Here are a few more pics from our outside time today:

Aden soaked to the bone wondering why I'm always wanting to take pictures of him having fun.

Archer upset after sitting down and realizing the grass was soaking wet!

He's BAAAACK!

John made it home in record speed (thanks to our friend Ruth that met him at the airport and had all his luggage already collected for him as he went to collect it!!) By 8:30 pm he was enjoying some yummy fajitas that Robin made:

Today, John woke Aden up with his new remote control car going crazy in his room! Thanks Grandma Campbell!

The boys enjoyed some nice gifts from daddy, the grandparents, and some aunties!

 

But their favorite present of all was having this guy back to play rough with:

24 Hour Delay

John left yesterday from Phoenix. While in Dulles he got an email that said his flight from Brussels to Freetown was delayed 24 hours. Poopy. 

This doesn't always happen, but as John told me this news... I was sad that I wouldn't get to see him the next day but I also had such a peace wash over me that could have only come from God. My heart is quiet and at peace. 

John's sad face at not getting home to us today

Right now he is in Brussels at a hotel with free meal vouchers. He did make it out to enjoy a hamburger and a beer in walking distance from the hotel. Plus he gets a good night's rest to break up his long plane flights.

John in Brussels

Did I mention John got to fly first class from Phoenix to Dulles? Our travel agent booked the flight through Brussels instead of United Airlines. With United every additional luggage past the first two free ones is usually $200. John had been planning to bring 3-4 extra luggage with project materials. But because Brussels charges $650 for additional luggage, John would have had to pay over $2K which would have been out of our price range. My mom thought of a loop hole. If he upgraded to first class ($179) his first two pieces of luggage would be alloted 70 pounds each instead of the usual 50 pounds. And then he would get the usual $200 price for additional luggage. Basically it ended up being like a free upgrade since he paid $179 for an additional 40 pounds of luggage.

Now to keep myself busy for another 24 hours...

Here's my excited face to see John

T-ball Time

Aden had a blast on his birthday. He got a nerf bow and arrow set, paw patrol figurine and puzzle, Leonardo TMNT, a Theo movie, race cars, and a bunch of sand and water toys.

Bow and arrow from Grandma and Grandpa Hunt

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and race cars from the Simmses and Sosas 

One gift I was really touched by was from a sweet 9 year old. The Courtney kids like to play baseball in the yard. Aden always liked the idea of baseball but is a little too young to be able to participate. A couple months ago I mentioned it would be nice if we had a t-stand so Aden could participate a little more. Owen must have got to thinking because on Saturday, Aden got to open this:

It's made from PVC pipe and the black part I think is from an old tractor part. They cleaned and painted out black. How sweet and thoughtful is that? It came with a nice soft bat and ball :)

Later we played and Aden wanted he and I to try to hit it at the same time. My competitive nature kicked in and I hit it first and got a home run! (Nobody else was in the field because Owen was taking pictures LOL) I've included the ones where I'm making a funny face so you're welcome :)

Rounding the bases!

At home plate! 

We are so blessed to have Owen as our neighbor. God knew just what Aden would need for a friend. They build sand castles together, play bad piggie together, and rough house all the time. We love you Owen!

In other news, John is on his way to the airport right now and WE ARE SO EXCITED!!! We can't wait to have our daddy and hubby back :) 

Happy 4th Birthday Aden!

Four years ago, my sweet little baby boy Aden made his entrance. Now, he will not let me call him my baby and insists he's a big boy.

Just looking at these pictures makes me want to cry! 

You are bright, joyful, energetic, and you are so full of zeal for life and for people. My prayer is that you grow in all of these traits and God grows you in areas of compassion for others, patience, obedience, and a love for God and others that moves you to action. 

Just some day to day things I want to remember about this age:

1. You could still take or leave food. If there is something fun to be doing or playing with, food can wait.

2. Favorite foods: donuts, French toast, Grandpa's Mickey Mouse pancakes, fruit snacks, peanut butter and honey sandwiches (new!), grilled cheese sandwiches, mac n cheese, cookies, chocolate milk, dessert of any kind (except ice cream! What?) I see a common thread in many of these foods! Who did he get this sweet tooth from? Yikes! That being said... You are not picky... You like chicken, fish, and will eat almost everything, particularly if we feed it to you. 

3. As of a couple days ago, you dropped your afternoon nap but are going to bed earlier. We are still doing rest time in your room (mostly so mommy can get a nap or do some chores).

4. You LOVE the Courtney family and ask to go over there all the time.  You LOVE hanging out with Owen, Auntie Robin, Anabelle and your best buddy Gight (Dwight). I can easily see why, they love you so well!

5. You can read! I actually gave you a break from teaching you how to read but you can already sound a lot of words out. I recently read a book called Better Late Than Early that basically insisted there is no rush in teaching kids to read and that it potentially can dampen their desire to read later on if forced. That being said... I think you will be an early reader, I just decided to revisit reading maybe in another six months and just let you be a kid for a little while longer.

6. You LOVE your daddy. You want to be as tall and strong as your daddy. Anytime you're around him, you say "want to play a rough game?" Which involves all sorts of dangerous tom foolery and jumping on beds in which I have to leave the room. 

7. Other things you love: running in the rain, playing in the sand box, trains, learning about dinosaurs, backyardigans,  looking at pictures in books, running back and forth down the hallway with Archer, all your grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

8. You make me laugh in the things you're starting to say:

-"What am I? Chopped liver?"

-"Archer, you've made a terrible mess!"

-When I suggest something you don't want to do "hey! I've got a good idea" and then give a different option.

- When Archer tries to take a toy or food away from you, you cry out some weird hybrid of the word "pancake" over and over again. I think it's your attempt at showing your displeasure about the situation but you'll often start laughing when we point out that you're, in fact, saying "pancake".

Here are a couple more pictures of you that I think exemplify your fun-loving personality:

You are such a joy and I'm so thankful that God gave me you... A precious gift, inheritance, and reward from the Lord. We have a fun day planned to celebrate you today and I can't wait for you to see some fun little gifts your family has sent you! We love you Aden Justus!

Piñata Fail

Aden's 4th birthday is coming up in three days. John is gone to the states so amidst our sadness of not having him around, I decided to try and make Aden's birthday really fun!

So yesterday Robin and all the kids and I set out to make a piñata by doing our own paper maché around a balloon. 

Problem one: the balloons we have have been kept at a constant level of warmth (75-95 degrees year round) and humidity for probably a couple of years. Most of the elasticity of my and John's lounging shorts don't last that long in this weather. On balloon #4, we finally made it to the stage of putting the first layer of paper maché on the balloon. The first three balloons popped soon after being blown up or in my face. We precariously hung up our paper maché outside to dry.

I was actually really impressed that it didn't bust within the first few hours. It even made it over night despite a slight loss of air.  Which brings us to:

Problem #2: The humidity during rainy season is 70-100%. Apparently, paper maché doesn't dry in that kind of humidity.  Under the weight of all that wetness, our sweet piñata fell to its demise. I propped it up on a water bottle in hopes that it can be revived but I have my doubts.

Plan B: making a piñata out of a cereal box. We're fancy like that :)

Mom Fails

1. Archer pooped in the bathtub AGAIN!!! I'm going to be excited when this phase ends for him. To be honest it's probably happened more times than I have fingers or toes, but who is counting?

2. Exhibit A

This standing on high heights happens 5-10 times a day. Most often it is on the kitchen table. He's dangerous.

Exhibit B

Exhibit C 

I can't believe he is able to climb up on our fridge. There is the solar battery on the side but Aden just learned to do this since we got back and he was 3.5 at that point.

3. I'm ashamed to admit this one, but Archer spilled my hot coffee on himself yesterday morning.  He was fine (it only got his arm and I promptly rushed him to the kitchen sink to run it under cold water) but it hurts my heart that I left it in his reach :(

We're ready for you to come home John! Over half way there! I hope you're bringing me lots of cheese! Luggage space... Smuggage space 

The Liberty of Obedience

Book Review:

My friend Shanna lent me this book by the recently late Elisabeth Elliott.  Her husband Jim Elliott was a missionary to the Auca Indians in South America. Not too long after they were married, Jim and four other missionaries were killed by a group of Auca's that had been misinformed of their intentions. The Aucas had a reputation for killing any white man (because they thought they were cannibals lol!) and for killing a lot In general. In an act of forgiveness, Elisabeth spent a year with the Aucas along with her then three year old daughter.  After Jim's death, eventually the message of Christ became known amongst the Auca's. They call God the Man Maker and have become a transformed people group. Their lives are no longer marked by fear, anger, and revenge.

The book is about the misconceptions we have about sin. Our American Christianity tends to be very black and white about sin. When we look at another culture through the lens of our said or unsaid rules, we see very much of what they do as sin. Elisabeth examines the activity of the Aucas (the name meaning Savages) and find them very un-savage like. So is it sinful that they don't wear clothes? If they "came as they are" to an American church they would probably be arrested or at the very least kicked out for their sinful behavior.  But can they still be followers of Christ in their nakedness? Absolutely. Therefore, is it sin to be naked? I would say no.

I really enjoyed this book, particularly because I live in another culture very different from my own. It has really challenged me not to look to the Bible for exact rules on how to manage every single situation, but to look to the person and example of Christ. Being able to discern the Spirit of the Law instead of just read the and memorize the letter of the Law is the mark of a mature believer. I definitely have a ways to go! 

Day 2

Oopsies!! Parenting fail... (Everything was off!)

Day One

Day One of John being gone.... Archer decides to have a lovely diarrhea episode in the bathtub.  And our bathtub is a big plastic tub... So no drain plug... I'm sorry I made you imagine what I had to go through.

And I told John this while he was at the airport in Washington, DC. This is the picture he sent me.

Something seems unfair about this... I'm literally drooling looking at that hamburger right now. 

(To be fair, John actually sent me a picture of that first before he heard about my evening. But still...)

How a Toddler Packs a Suitcase

Today John has already left us for two weeks to the states. To be honest, I'm not looking forward to spending 14 days as a single parent. I did 4 days last week while John was deepening a well in Ronurie and it was harder than I thought! We spent three weeks apart in March but I had the ease of first world comforts and two grandparents that were very helpful!

Right now I'm meditating on the verse (and accompanying song) Psalm 118:24 

This is the day 

This is the day 

That the Lord has made 

That the Lord has made

Let us rejoice

Let us rejoice

And be glad in it 

And be glad in it

And this is what Aden packed in his suitcase because he really wanted to go with Daddy.

Includes: preschool workbook, five paw patrol figurines (for his cousins Ada and Henry to play with), adult toothbrush, two bubble wands, a magic cup, a non functioning lantern, and a dirty sock.

Aden also wrote John a little note that I'll post once John finds it hidden in his suitcase.  (And John here's a hint to its locale if you read this: You'll definitely find it by Sunday if not earlier)